The next morning, Stubb went over to talk to Flask.
“I just had the wildest dream ever, King‑Post,” Stubb began. “You know the captain’s ivory leg? In my dream, he kicked me with it. I tried to kick back, and would you believe it, I kicked my own leg clean right off!”
“Then all at once, Ahab turned into a huge stone pyramid. There I was, some raging fool, kicking away at it over and over.”
“But here is the weird part, Flask — you know how messed‑up dreams get. Even while I was furious, part of my brain kept telling myself it was not even that big of an insult. I thought, ‘Come on, what is the big deal? That was not a real leg. It is just a fake bone one.’”
“There is a world of difference between a blow from living flesh and a blow from something dead and hard. A punch from a real hand hurts your pride way worse than getting hit with a stick. The living body carries the real insult, my friend.”
“So there I was, smashing my toes against that giant pyramid. My mind was all tangled up. I kept thinking, ‘That is nothing more than a cane, a whalebone cane. What he gave me was just a rough tap with wood and bone, not a real vicious kick.’”
“And I thought, look at the tip of that ivory leg. The foot end is tiny and pointed. If some big‑footed farmer kicked me, that would be a huge, humiliating insult. This one shrinks down to just a little sharp point.”
“Now here comes the craziest part of the dream. I am still hammering away at that pyramid, when this weird old sea‑creature with shaggy hair and a big hump on his back grabs me by the shoulders and spins me around.”
‘What do you think you are doing?’ he says.
“Man, I got scared right then. What an ugly face he had. But fast enough, my fear faded.”
‘What am I doing?’ I shot back. ‘Mind your own business, you hunchback. You looking for a kick from me?’
“The second those words left my mouth, he turned his back toward me, bent over, and swept up a bunch of seaweed to use like a rag. And guess what I saw? His rear end was stuck full of marlinspikes, points sticking straight out!”
“I changed my mind real quick. ‘Uh‑oh, I think I will skip kicking you, old man.’”
‘Smart move, Stubb. Very smart Stubb,’ he kept repeating. He mumbled it over and over, moving his gums like some creepy old witch.”
“He would not stop going ‘wise Stubb, wise Stubb’. So I figured I might as well go back to kicking the pyramid again. I barely lifted my foot, when he roared.”
‘Quit that kicking!’
‘Hey now, what is your problem?’ I asked him.
‘Let’s talk about this insult. Captain Ahab kicked you, did he not?’
‘Yeah, he sure did. Right there.’
‘And he used his ivory leg, correct?’
‘That is right.’
‘Alright then, wise Stubb, what have you got to complain about? He kicked you with real force. It was not some cheap pine wood leg. A great man kicked you, with a fine ivory leg. That is an honour. I would call it an honour.’”
‘Listen to me, wise Stubb. Back in old England, noblemen felt proud when the queen slapped them and made them knights. You should be proud that Ahab kicked you, it has made you wise. Take his kicks as compliments. Never kick back. You cannot win. Do you see that pyramid?’
“And then, somehow, he just floated off into thin air. I started snoring, rolled over, and woke up in my hammock. So what do you make of that whole crazy dream, Flask?”
“It sounds pretty silly to me,” Flask replied.
“Maybe it is. But it has actually taught me something, Flask. See Ahab over there, staring off toward the stern?”
“Best advice I can give you: leave that old man alone. Do not go picking fights with him, no matter what he says.”
Just then, Ahab shouted across the deck.
“Men up in the mastheads! Keep your eyes peeled! Whales are nearby!
If you spot a white whale, scream your lungs out!”
Stubb turned back toward Flask.
“You hear that? That is strange, is it not? A white whale. You catch that? Something heavy is brewing. Ahab has blood on his mind. Shh, keep quiet. He is coming our way.”