Valancourt, meanwhile, was suffering the deepest pain of regret and despair.
Seeing Emily again had brought back all the passion and tenderness he had felt when he first loved her. The distance between them and the distractions of life had only weakened those feelings for a short time, but they had never truly disappeared.
When he received Emily’s letter and immediately set out for Languedoc, he already knew that his own foolish actions had ruined his future. He had never intended to hide the truth from her.
However, he believed the only consequence of his mistakes would be a delay in their marriage. He never imagined that Emily would decide to end their relationship forever.
The thought of losing her completely overwhelmed him. Already suffering from guilt and shame, he waited anxiously for their second meeting, almost losing control of himself. Yet he still held onto a small hope that his words might persuade her to forgive him and remain with him.
The next morning, he sent a message asking when Emily would receive him.
The message arrived while Emily was speaking with the Count. The Count had deliberately found another opportunity to discuss Valancourt with her. He could see how deeply troubled she was and feared that her determination would fail when faced with Valancourt’s desperate pleas.
After Emily dismissed the messenger, the Count returned to the painful subject.
“My greatest fear,” he said, “is that Valancourt’s emotions and promises will weaken your decision. If you refuse to accept a short period of sorrow now, you may condemn yourself to a lifetime of suffering.”
His repeated warnings were the only thing that could protect Emily from the love she still felt for Valancourt.
After much inner struggle, she decided to follow his advice.
At last, the time for their meeting arrived.
Emily entered the room with as much calmness as she could manage, but Valancourt was so overcome with emotion that for several minutes he could not speak.
When he finally found his voice, his first words were filled with sorrow, pleading, and self-blame.
“Emily,” he said, “I have loved you—I still love you more than my own life. But I have destroyed myself through my own actions.”
“I know I have been ruined by my mistakes. Yet even now, my heart wishes to hold onto you, even though that would only bring you misery. I would rather keep you and make you unhappy than accept the punishment I deserve—the loss of you.”
“I have been a miserable man, but I will not become a selfish one. I will not try to weaken your decision with desperate appeals. I give you up, Emily. I will try to find comfort in knowing that, although I suffer, you may still find happiness.”
“The sacrifice I make is not entirely my own achievement. I would never have had the strength to release you if your wisdom had not demanded it.”
He stopped speaking.
Emily tried to hide the tears that had filled her eyes.
She wanted to say, “You are speaking now as the man you once were,” but she forced herself to remain silent.
“Forgive me, Emily,” Valancourt continued, “for all the pain I have caused you. And sometimes, when you remember the unhappy Valancourt, think only that his greatest comfort would be knowing you are no longer suffering because of his foolishness.”
Tears now fell freely down Emily’s cheeks.
Seeing her sorrow, Valancourt almost lost control again. He seemed ready to surrender to despair, but Emily struggled to regain her strength and end a meeting that was causing both of them unbearable pain.
When Valancourt saw her tears and noticed that she was preparing to leave, he tried once more to calm himself and comfort her.
“The memory of this sorrow will protect me in the future,” he said. “Never again will temptation or bad examples have the power to lead me away from what is right. Your suffering will always remind me of the person I must become.”
These words gave Emily some comfort.
“We are parting forever,” she said quietly, “but if my happiness truly matters to you, then remember this: nothing will bring me more peace than knowing you have regained your own respect and honor.”
Valancourt took her hand.
His eyes were filled with tears, and the farewell he wished to speak disappeared into his trembling sighs.
After a moment, Emily forced herself to say:
“Farewell, Valancourt. May you be happy.”
She repeated the words and tried to withdraw her hand, but he still held it, covering it with his tears.
“Why should we prolong these moments?” Emily whispered. “They are too painful for both of us.”
“This is too much—too much,” Valancourt cried.
He finally released her hand, fell into a chair, covered his face with his hands, and was overcome by painful sobs.
For a long time, neither spoke.
Emily cried silently while Valancourt struggled to control his grief.
At last, she rose again, determined to leave.
Trying to regain his composure, Valancourt said:
“I am hurting you again, but please let the suffering I feel speak for my heart.”
Then, in a solemn voice that often trembled with emotion, he continued:
“Farewell, Emily. You will always be the only person I have ever truly loved. Sometimes you may remember the unhappy Valancourt, and perhaps you will feel pity for him, even if you can no longer respect him.”
“What is the whole world to me without you? Without your respect?”
He stopped suddenly.
“I am making the same mistake again,” he said. “I am thinking only of my own pain. I must not trouble you any longer, or I will fall back into despair.”
Once more, he said goodbye.
He pressed her hand to his lips, looked at her one final time, and quickly left the room.
Emily remained sitting in the chair where he had been.
Her heart was filled with such deep sorrow that she could hardly breathe. She listened to his footsteps fading away as he crossed the hall, each sound growing weaker and weaker until it disappeared.
At last, the voice of the Countess calling from the garden brought her back to herself.
When she looked around, the first thing she saw was the empty chair where Valancourt had been sitting.
The tears she had held back after his departure now flowed freely, bringing her a small relief.
Only after she had regained some control over her emotions was she able to return to her own room.